News:

Eurofurence 28 — "Cyberpunk"
Sep 18 – 21, 2024
CCH — Congress Center Hamburg


Women at Furry Conventions

Started by Cheetah, 08.11.2013, 12:51:51

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Suicune

I noticed much more female furs on the EF this year. Mad me feel really comfortable :)

gummi_bjorn

i dont agree with the article either..

the reason im going to EF21 is to meet some of the great people in this fantastic fandom, male or female.
and i cant meet new people if i can't introduce myself to them whether they are male or female.
yes i am a straight and single male, but i have been single for around 20 years of my own choice (long story)
so i'm only looking to meet interresting new (hopefully) friends.

why does some males get so frustrated or needy, that they start stalking or grabbing women??

when i meet a girl/woman that i would like to get to know as a friend, i dont "assault" them but instead introduce myself as a gentleman and wait to see if they respond kindly to my introduction.
if yes we can talk and get to know each other and hopefully become friends.
if no i will excuse myself and leave her alone. the same goes for men as well.

since i am not looking for sex or an girlfriend this topic can almost scare me of meeting the female furs.
as i dont want to be mistaken for a creap.

so i hope to meet you all, and have a lot of fun and new friends.

gummibjorn.


karpour

A big problem is that lots of people think they know what the con experience for women is like and what women should do.
I don't, and if you're a guy, neither do you. So the best way to find out is actually asking and listening.
Also, what doesn't help is saying "Hey look at this girl on Tumblr wildly exaggerating, I guess all women are exaggerating about negative experiences"

Fineas

I guess reflecting on your behavior, comes a long way.

"Treat others like you want to be treated."

And if it goes a bit deeper try this one:

"Be the type of person you want your son/daughter to date with."

Subtext: Looking at yourself in the mirror and being able to grasp how others perceive you is tough (for many). It might be easier if you think of the other person to be your offspring and the relation that is going on is intimate. That might help reflect on what you think is acceptable behavior.

Laws and rules are their because someone went WAY over a certain unspoken line. So what some perceive as normal behavior because for example: this is how they treat their close friends, they have seen this (on TV) or maybe even have these wild fantasies (driven by heroic 007 / romanticized 'easy' pickups ) they have seen and have accept as 'how things actually could go'.
These might be a real turn off within the social norm in any relation ship, even just friendship.

That said many that are confronted with rules or other implications might feel overwhelmed and quickly grab to the notion that it's like 'walking a fine line'.
While in reality, it often isn't. Their are a wild range of goofy, funny and even dumb things you can do intentionally and unintentionally that will not offend people. We love fursuiters that do stuff like: steal your drink and keep it away from you, bypass a row and start interacting with security or dive right in to the dealers den, come up all close and interact with you just cm's/inches away from you.

Those are a lot of things that normal people really do not feel comfortable with or even find offensive. But that context makes it acceptable.
We enjoy fursuiters for their (in a lot of cases) goofy and entertaining behavior. It comes down to understanding these unwritten rules and feel them, they are not really hard, but abstract, you can not make a definitive list of things you can and can not do. Because they also change with the setting, context, passing of time and culture differences.

Bottom line in my opinion is that you have to be just. If you act out of good faith, take responsibility for your actions (even if you are 'mildly' intoxicated) then many things that could have ended in a very embarrassing and (emotional) painful situation. Can be resolved with a well meant sorry with an explanation why you thought it was the way to go. And hear the other side, why they perceive it differently / as an attack on their private space / attack on their own person.

And learn from them. Even after that you might disagree, but at least you have shown respect for someone else's view on the matter and their very personal subjugation of what happened. You can not change the fact that X happened to person Y because you choose to do that, even if you honestly meant no harm or view said thing as acceptable.

arutsu

Quote from: Suicune on 29.08.2014, 16:53:32
I noticed much more female furs on the EF this year. Mad me feel really comfortable :)

add one more to the list :) nice reading material for a 1st joiner :)
-= Fresh blood =-